A small middle of the night rant

Reading people say “Who is Bruce Jenner?” (mostly on main pages) and suppose maybe Bruce was some sort of athlete of some sort, but mostly a reality star is driving me up the fucking wall. Bruce Jenner spent a lot of time as one of the most famous athletes in the world, winning the decathlon, a victory that is counted… » 4/25/15 3:09am Today 3:09am

Will you buy an apple watch?

When I heard about this at first, I thought “This is bullshit. It’ll be like those watches that played pac-man,” which is cool but not work paying between 350 and 17,000 or so. Then I saw a commercial with all these tiny bits of information flashing on screen and the consumer part of my brain flickered with desire.… » 4/24/15 4:39pm Yesterday 4:39pm

Snacktastic's Law of Humor

If you say a joke once and it’s funny, it becomes unfunny when you repeat it too many times. But if you repeat it a whole bunch of times after that, then it becomes funny again but then if you keep repeating it —it becomes unfunny. However, if you keep beating it into the ground, it will eventually become funny. So if…

» 4/23/15 9:05pm Thursday 9:05pm

Travel writing suggestions

You know, anyone can pitch something to flygirl. I wonder what kind of travel writing would you do? I think I’m going to write how I saw the World’s Largest Axe and learned to love myself and axes, but mostly myself. It’ll feature the poutine I ate at the Irving Station. Not exciting for poutine but exciting for a gas… » 4/23/15 5:29pm Thursday 5:29pm

Halt and Catch Fire

I binged watched this show recently and it is coming back on AMC this spring for season 2. Is anyone else watching it? It’s about a group of computer developers on the Silicon Prairie in Texas in the early 80s. There is a lot of drama. Smart women computer engineers figure pretty prominently (and get increasingly… » 4/22/15 1:47pm Wednesday 1:47pm

Hey, it's time for a lunch quiz

I was gonna write “HEY JERKS” but you know, you aren’t really jerks. I just like calling people jerks because it’s funny and I’m most likely a jerk. It’s time for an inevitable buzzfeed quiz, namely “Which food should you marry?” And if you get pancakes, I’m just gonna say if you like it, you should put a ring on it. » 4/21/15 2:19pm Tuesday 2:19pm

Bullshit from teen movies

There was a lot of bullshit from teen movies, but what annoyed me when I was a kid was how Molly Ringwald was all poor on Pretty in Pink. What killed me was that she had a really cool pink car, apparently bought from her tough job at the hip record store. I worked at Dairy Queen which afforded me the right to borrow… » 4/20/15 8:44pm Monday 8:44pm

Teachers of the world!

I teach a full class load of grad school classes, which means I am correcting 60 papers. And it’s fine but so much work. I spent a solid decade writing long involved court documents (court ordered evaluations) and yet that seemed easier than this. Maybe it’s all just in retrospect. What do you do to get through this… » 4/20/15 2:18pm Monday 2:18pm

Theme of the Week: Teen Movies

Next week, we will get back to talking ab0ut 70s film, but as suggested by the most wicked of backtalkers, from Rebel without a Cause (and I suppose even earlier) to whatever crap the kids are watching today, let’s talk teen films. For reference, I have included the all-important montage scene from the greatest teen… » 4/19/15 8:35pm Sunday 8:35pm

I'm such a ridiculous mimic for accents

I tend to pick up the accents of people around me very quickly. I’ve spent a few days around my Canadian relatives and I can already hear myself changing. I think I called my mom “mum” and I certainly know my “a’s” and intonation has changed. It doesn’t help that this is very similar to how I talked growing up but it… » 4/18/15 8:32pm 4/18/15 8:32pm